A poem for my niece on the third day of her life
I’m a bad uncle
your father used to pick me up
after school
& we’d run scams
immortal bandits
ceaselessly
scraping away
at the great comedy
We smoked cigarettes
on the railroad tracks
with a group of soft-reckless
when we were boys
& walked in the woods
pretended to be older
than we really were
He had one of those dark green sedans
with a gold stripe ran along its side
transfixed in the passenger seat
witness to all that laid before
& is now known well in the heart as Cleveland
he showed me the ropes
the years would bring distance between us
never for quarrel
but simply as they will with young people finding places to sit
somehow we’d end up
in the same dank basements
wind-rotten front porches
malice-infested apartments
low-down holes
we learned that taste together I suppose
He ran among marauders of youth
though his heart stay gentle
past that rough patch on his jaw
& those boys would learn to like me
on his word-
I’d imagine
& for that
many doors were opened
to an unlikely
there is a lot to tell you
& I am expert of nothing
forgive our shortcomings
& allow us an effort still
if I may give you
what is close to me now
for I am young & prone to err
though when you know what I mean
that will have changed
when I grow callous
it’s hidden in me like secret poison
laying inert for what seems to you eons
listen dear
you shouldn’t quell what ails
what slowly eats at the gut will reside
& through the cardiovascular system it will seep
in fact
I was
the most evil man in town
your father warned me against
my forthcoming
but the pride of the wretched
is hard to break
the habits of hollow men
too sturdy
It is in solitary that we learn ourselves most
but we must remember
to keep our eyes open
we must be patient with eachother
don’t know how
we ended up
all the places we did
but I was always glad
to see him there
why
you’re a little girl
I don’t even know your name